Is there ever a bad reason to forgive?

Seems like a rhetorical question, but I am serious. Is there ever a bad time to forgive someone? Do I forgive because I feel like the other person is deserving of forgiveness? Or, the converse, do I ever withhold forgiveness because someone is not worthy? That's a harder question. I guess I could say that all of these have something to do with my faith, don't they?

On Sunday, we will hear once again from Luke's Gospel, the story of the "dishonest steward" (Luke 16:1-13). In that story, the dishonest steward of the master's estate has been mismanaging things and he got caught. In order to make amends, what could the steward do? Well, this guy "cooks the books"! That's right, the dishonest manager of the estate decided to forgive every debt - at least partly so.

This story creates lots of challenges for me and even more questions: Was it right to forgive on behalf of someone else? If so, how does that apply to me as I forgive others on behalf of God? When I forgive someone, does the other person have to accept that s/he is forgiven? What happens if s/he does not accept the forgiveness I have offered?

A long time ago, someone told me that forgiveness is not about others; it's about me. Forgiveness is about me letting go of the power that holds me down in a relationship. When I name those powers, I start to gain control over them; as I struggle with them, and get more uncomfortable with them, their power tries to overtake me. In forgiveness, I say, "No more!" I bind the powers of sin that try to keep me from moving forward and there's a two-fold deliverance: (1) I am freed from the other person's anger; (2) I free myself from my own regret.

Sometimes this two-fold process happens simultaneously; at other times, one step follows the other. In the end, the result is always the same. Someone is set free from spiraling deeper into an endless abyss of grief, pain and self-denial. There really is no better way to say it. Often the evil from which one is created comes directly from the heart of individuals; at other times, that evil is systemic in culture or society (such as in racism).

So, is there ever a bad reason to forgive?